Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Dreams of the Young, Dreams about Confrontation

"this past January I had a crush on a guy in my class, his name was Chris. Before I went to bed that night I was instant messaging Chris and he told me he liked me back. One night I had a dream that I was sitting alone in the cafeteria playing solitaire on my iPod. Chris walked out of the gym sat next to me on my right and turned to me. For some reason I wasn't surprised that he did so. He opened his mouth and said " Penny can't see us dating" then I put down my iPod turned to him and said "well I can I mean I’m starting to" then I woke up. I felt calm like I knew he had come and sat by me to talk many time before and like we dating just letting everyone to get use to it. When he came and sat by me he was calm cool and collected, he was also wearing a red t-shirt and a pair of blackish gray baggy jeans which is like his favorite outfit. The thing of it is in real life we are not dating he said he liked me but didn't want to date and that was it.

So the other night I had a dream I was at a drive in movie during the day. I was sitting in a red old fashion convertible with a few of my class mates. I was paying extra attention to Chris, I mean to say I was flirting with him. I remember that where we where watching the movie was in a dirt parking lot with tall buildings on either side. The sun was high in the sky. We where all sitting around the inside edges of the car with the top down and not really paying attention to the movie. We were laughing and talking just having fun.

After what seemed like a few minutes I told Chris his hair was getting as long as mine and it is and I pulled his head to my stomach and shook his hair. That’s when I started walking to the makeshift concession stand. I walked in and started talking to some girl whom I have never seen before. She was tall and skinny had brown eyes and red hair and wearing a black sweatshirt and jeans. I don't know if this means anything because we didn't talk long. After talking with her for a short moment I walked past what looked like a rotating cake cooled I stopped at a glass counter. There was no one there so I lifted the glass lid and took the unsalted soft pretzel with a side of cheese. I turned around and saw Chris and some of our friends walking towards me. I turned back around because of a feeling of anger. when I turned I saw my friend, Amelie, standing there smiling and we talked for a short moment when Chris stood right next to me as if to make me angry and it didn't. The rest of the people joined in we just stood there and kept on talking. Then I woke up.

Ok I really need your help. I need to know how I should feel about Chris if it can be interpreted from these dreams. If it means anything I’m 13 yrs old and in 8th grade. I really need to know. I hope this is enough. Through out the dream, except when I mention otherwise, I felt nothing. In the real world I am VERY mad at Chris because he broke my heart and is going out with another girl. He keeps asking me why I'm mad but I refuse to tell him. He used to be a good friend but slowly I noticed he was a huge flirt and never really cared about me." - Anonymous

Thank you for sending me this very interesting dream. In the instance of a dream like this, that springs from an emotionally complex situation, and an emotionally intense period of time as adolescence is, our brains will create situations in our dream life that reflect our waking life. In dreams of this kind, situations are typically simplified, and our actions, since they have no consequences, are generally based entirely on how we feel about these situations. I believe that your dream is a manifestation of the way you'd like things to be, and the way that you feel about how things actually are.

So in this first dream, you're sitting by yourself at school during nutrition or lunch or whatever. Chris comes over to you, and you both feel calm, and like things are right and as they should be. This is simply because this is what you want or have wanted to happen. What he says to you, that a friend or acquaintance of yours doesn't think the two of you should date, that is the excuse that he may have actually used, or the thing you were left to assume was the case. The fact that he's wearing his favorite outfit in your dream suggests to me that the version of Chris that you're crushing on so hard is an idealized version, that is, you like the person that you think Chris is. What it seems you're realizing later is that he is not exactly who you thought he was.

The second dream is interesting as well. The setting and your attention to the setting says a lot- you're in a cool old car, at a place without adults or supervision where you can all hang out and be yourselves. You're in a somewhat isolated spot, a dirt lot surrounded by buildings, forgotten, undeveloped and it seems to belong to your group alone. Teenagers often feel a sense of isolation from the larger society, and I think that this isolated setting reflects that. I remember thinking, as a teenager, that no one could ever understand the world that I lived in. There are codes of conduct among teens that are as complex as those in the adult politics of the workplace, or among groups of neighbors etc, if not more complex. Your dream exists within the context of your reality, and for that reason, you are the last word on what it means- but I do think that this dream reflects the isolation of living in a microcosm of a larger society. Rather than being tortured by this isolation, though, you relish it. You're laughing, you're joking, you're flirting.

So next there is this somewhat intimate moment with Chris, you're pulling his hair, kinda cuddling with him. All this is stuff you're initiating, by the way. I suspect that you have spent some time holding back, not doing things with him that you'd like to do, either because you suspect he wouldn't like it or it just doesn't seem appropriate. But here, in your dream, you can do these things without reproach- so you do.

Then you want a snack. You go to find one, and you find this random girl, and apparently no one working at the concession stand. You have a decent interaction with this girl, in that you have a conversation that's somewhat memorable but not really. You don't seem to love her or hate her, she's just another girl that shares a little space with you. She might signify the perpetual presence of other women as competition for men, an idea you're likely becoming increasingly aware of!

When there's no one to serve you a pretzel, you take one. I think that point is important- you're taking what you want yet again, as you were doing when flirting with Chris in the car. You're very specific about what you want (no salt, with a side of cheese) and after you've taken it, you are confronted by your class. You turn away from this confrontation, inexplicably angry.

This feeling, I suspect, comes from the anger you feel over the situation with Chris. On some level, you feel open to the scrutiny of your peer group over this situation. In the dream, he brings your peer group to you, placing all their eyes on you, and it makes you mad. Further, he's done something to make you angry- he's acted like a jerk, leading you on and then dating another girl, and you haven't told him to go f*#k himself. I suspect that you want to! When you turn away from him, you turn to your good friend, and she acts as a system of support. You talk to her and things go back to normal again, Chris just comes up beside you and everything's ok again.

So what does it all mean? Well, it means you're learning some hard lessons about men. You can write off half the species and say that guys suck, but that's pretty short-sighted. Everyone has their own set of motivations, and reasons for doing what they do. Sometimes people can be really hurtful without realizing they've done anything to you at all. We all exist in separate spheres and separate realities, and the only way for one person to know the motivations, feelings, hopes and dreams of another person is through an exchange of honest information. There are many reasons NOT to tell someone how you feel about them, or why you're doing the things you're doing- but in this instance, I would tell Chris what he did. Tell him you're mad because you ARE mad, even if the emotion doesn't make sense to you completely, you still have a right to be angry or frustrated- and if he cares about you as a friend, he'll listen and apologize.

I hope this was helpful. Please feel free to email me your dreams at Rachel.Beezy88@gmail.com for a free dream reading at any time! Also feel free to leave comments here, publicly, or by email. I've really enjoyed interpreting your dream, hope you enjoyed reading it.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Dreams about Driving a Steep Mountain Road

Hi :) every once in a while I have this odd dream where I have to drive up and extremely steep road, and I can never manage (as steep as a wall!) except this time, I'm at the top but the car is hanging by my feet and I'm clinging to the top the best that I can. I think of letting the car go and flinging myself over but I woke up by that time. What does it all mean? It would be great if you could help me out... thanks!

What a great example of the kind of recurring dream motif that most people experience at some point in their lives. Thank you so much for emailing me your dream for a free analysis! Let's see if we can get to the bottom of this...

Having a dream in which you're driving a car typically reflects the sense of the type of control that you're having over your life. In this case, you are the person driving the car, so your dream is showing you that you are in control of your own life. A mountain road, or a steep road that a person travels up in their dreams is a symbol of a life obstacle or major problem that has to be overcome; the amount of trouble that a person has traveling up the road is in direct relation to the difficulty of solving or overcoming that problem. These roads can then be as simple as a little hilly climb, or they can be the type of sheer cliff face that you're describing- the harder the climb, the more struggle you're having with this problem.

In this dream, you've made it to the top, but you're barely hanging on. The mechanism which enabled you to get to the top is now weighing you down, and you're thinking about jumping... so my translation of your dream is this: there is an intense struggle, either physical or emotional, that you've managed to get on top of. Despite the fact that you've overcome this obstacle doesn't mean you're really over it, you are still working through it and you have a sense that you'd rather give in than deal with it.

While I don't know the issues plaguing your personal life, and I wouldn't assume that you're dealing with this particular issue, the images you're describing remind me of what addicts term "white-knuckle sobriety." Sometimes a person with an addiction will have a period of sobriety in which they are not actively seeking treatment or moving through the issues which have caused them to seek out the exciting escape of drugs, sex, gambling, shopping etc. In this period of sobriety, they will reject the idea that they need any real treatment, and their sobriety is rooted in a deep and intense drive to refrain from the excesses of their addiction, and typically they are hanging on by a thread. White-knuckling refers to their tight yet tenuous grasp on the situation... for obvious reasons this is what comes to my mind when I think about your dream, in which you have a tenuous grasp on the edge of a steep cliff.

Whatever the issue is for you personally, I would suggest an examination of the problem from all angles. Think about what you've done to get on top of that cliff, and your motivations to overcome. You can find the problem, and the strength to conquer it, within yourself. I hope this free dream interpretation can help you, and thank you again for sending it to me! Please feel free to send your dreams to me again in the future, my email again is rachel.beezy88@gmail.com
-Rachel

Dreams about Baby Goats, Driving and Roosting Geese!

Hi Rachel- last night I had the strangest dream! My hubby and I were driving in a woodsy area near a lake. we spotted a small white baby goat on the side of the road and picked it up. After a while of holding and cuddling it we decided we couldn't keep it, so we put it back out on the side of the road. Another car picked it up and while following the car we realized we could keep the goat at my aunt's farm.

We followed the man to his house and begged for the goat back, and he obliged. I held the goat like a small child. In the same dream though I don't remember if it was before or after we had the goat, there were a lot of very large brown geese in the road, and while trying to navigate through them one flew right in my open window and roosted in the back of the car. I opened my door and it flew back out. I don't usually remember non-scary dreams in such detail so I figure this may be some kind of message. Any help interpreting this dream would be appreciated! Thanks!

This is a great dream, I'm so glad you remembered it and decided to send it in for a free dream reading! Let's look at these images one by one and then piece them back together.

Your car and the road you travel on in your dreams is the way in which you're moving through the metaphorical journey of your life. You don't specify which of you is actually driving the car, but you may feel that the driver is the person who is ultimately in control of some of the major decisions that the two of you make about your life. This is likely the person in the relationship who acts as the practical one; possibly handling the family expenses, etc.

That you're driving through a scenic, woodsy country road suggests that things are going pretty well for you. Certainly no person's life is a vacation every day, but the place you are describing is a nice little vacation spot- some woods and a lake sound pretty good to me!

The symbol of the goat has many meanings, most of which are determined by the specifics of what type of goat you see in your dream. An adult male goat can be a symbol of sexuality, as seen in the Wiccan god Pan, who has the feet and legs of a goat with the upper body of a man. In the pagan traditions, Pan is playful; he's a prankster with voracious sexual appetites. The Christian religion, when taking over Europe, acquired Pan and subverted his image by bringing his form into their religion as the Devil. For this reason, much of the dream symbolism around goats is indicative of the Christian superstitions of Pan: the books may say that goats represent a bad omen of your own dishonest nature, or they may suggest that you'll cheat on your spouse, or that some other kind of bad luck will befall you.

Now I don't intend to bash Christianity, but if you've ever wondered why so many images of the Devil involve a half-goat, half-man figure, Pan is the answer. And if you've ever tried to look up the meaning of a dream involving a goat, you might be mislead by the manipulation of the image. Rather than looking at dreams as superstitious omens, I prefer to think of them as a collection of archetypal images that our minds generate while we sleep in order to resolve issues that may be troubling us in our waking lives.

Because your goat is a "kid" or a baby, considering it's white and that you're treating it like a child, I believe that your dream is reflecting something more maternal and far less sinister than many of the books will proclaim. The addition of geese, animals frequently seen as good mothers, to the dream continues this theme. Your gentle treatment of this sweet and adorable little animal, along with the caring way in which you let the goose out at the side of the road, suggest that you have a strong maternal instinct.

However, being a mother might be something you're putting off. Rather than immediately accepting either animal in your car, you drop both off. In the case of the baby goat, you and your husband don't feel you can keep it. Later you realize you can, and you're relieved that you're able to help the little critter.

Perhaps you're coming to a point in your life where this issue is coming up between the two of you. Is it time for children, or for more children? Only you know for sure. Thank you again for sending this great dream for a free dream analysis. Please feel free to email me at Rachel.Beezy88@gmail.com with any comments you may have, or any more dreams, scary or not, that you might remember!

dream about a romantic picnic with a crush!

"A few weeks ago I dreamt that I was having a picnic in the countryside with someone I currently have a crush on. The setting felt like it might have been Solvang, CA. We were sitting on a green sloping hill, enjoying ourselves, when something happened which interrupted our picnic. I can't even be sure what it was. All I remember is someone telling us we had to move and that there was some danger in store for us if we stayed there. We took our picnic basket and ran for safe shelter.

Below the hill we found a village full of people who only spoke DUTCH?! We could not understand what they were trying to tell us. There was also something strange about this little village. The people who lived there were very very tiny and the houses were very small. We were looking for shelter but we could not fit in anywhere. We had nowhere to take cover.

I guess I should note that in real life, the person I have a crush on does not know it yet. But I have had thoughts about telling them. This may or may not be important to the dream. I don't know. Any insight you might be able to give me would really be appreciated. This one has been on my mind for weeks!!"

What an interesting group of dream images, thank you so much for sending your dream for a free dream interpretation. I hope my assimilation of these images is helpful!

Dreaming about a picnic can be a representation of an idyllic domestic situation OR a bounty of opportunities for growth and learning. I'd say that because your picnic buddy is a love interest, your picnic likely means both of these things! Chances are you could see yourself having a very good day-to-day relationship with this person, and relationships are places where we can learn a ton about ourselves.

Solvang, CA, for those of us whom have never visited it, is a beautiful little town situated in the rolling hills north of Ventura County. It's basically a little Danish village set against an amazing landscape, where traditional Danish foods, activities and architecture can be observed. I think it's very interesting that the people of your village spoke Dutch, and that the village and surrounding area looked like Solvang to you. I do think that it's important that your crush doesn't know your feelings, and I don't think that it's a coincidence that the two of you are among people who you can't speak to or understand. In this way, I believe that the people and the little town represent the things left unsaid between you.

Things out of scale in dreams operate in relational ways, so the size of something in relation to you is the level of importance they bear to you. So here, where the strange people you can't communicate with represent the things the two of you aren't saying to one another are smaller than you, I would guess that the things you aren't saying aren't as important as the time you're spending interacting with one another. This may be the reason why you haven't said anything yet- it doesn't feel important!

The unnamed danger lurking in the back ground that interrupts your picnic (aka your potential domestic bliss) from which you can find no shelter (as all the houses are too small) may be your fear that your feelings are not reciprocated by your crush.

In short, you are dreaming about your feelings surrounding the crush. Does this person feel the way you do? Is it "dangerous" to let them know what you're feeling, or is it important to let them know? Isn't it possible to just enjoy the picnic?

These questions are for you alone to answer! Thanks again for submitting this dream. I hope that this free dream analysis was helpful to you. Please feel free to email me any dreams you'd like to have read for you at Rachel.Beezy88@gmail.com as well as any comments you might have.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Reoccurring dreams

"I need your help,
For the last 6-7 weeks I have been having the same dream every night, but in the last 2 week it is also happening during the day when I am awake.
 
The dream is, I am standing looking down a very dark tunnel or hallway, at the end there is a very bright white light, then out of nowhere this hall way or tunnel starts filling with silhouettes of men, woman, and children. They are all trying to communicate with me, all I can hear is mumbling but then it gets louder and louder till I am waking up and yelling at them to go away.

My husband thinks I am going mad, and personally so do I, what does this mean and why does it also happen in the middle of the day. It just won't go away, I keep hearing the voices in my head and can see this tunnel or hall way.  Please help." - Anonymous

 What a powerful set of images. Let me start by saying that I am not a mental health professional, and therefore would not be qualified to make a diagnosis about a person's mental condition. In my humble opinion, I do not think you're going mad, but if you're experiencing a full-on hallucination during waking hours (IE if the dream is as real during the day as it is at night) it would be a good idea to talk to a professional just in case. 

The phenomenon you're describing above is a version of what is often described by people who have had a near-death experience. People will often say that at the moment of physical death they see a light at the end of a long tunnel, often fringed with loved ones who have passed away. Some experts theorize that this vision is actually a sort of recycled early memory of birth, and I think it could easily be argued that this prevalent vision could be a sort of dream state that the mind wanders into as the body looses the ability to remain alive, the brain is depleted of blood etc.

What struck me as immediately odd in the case of your dream is that you're not dying. At least, not anymore than anyone else! You're brain is not loosing it's access to blood or oxygen at the moments you're experiencing these dreams, is it? I didn't think so. 

Reoccurring dreams reoccur because whatever issue they highlight isn't dealt with or examined. They can be hugely frustrating, but typically once a person figures out what their dream is all about it will go away.

So there are a few ways we can look at this dream, first bearing in mind the theory about tunnels as symbols for the birth canal. A dream about a light at the end of a tunnel can mean that you are experiencing a need for the security, protection and stability that you experienced as an infant. It can also mean that you're coming into a time or rebirth or renewed hope; and in this case you certainly have nothing to fear. A dream about a tunnel can also indicate that you have "tunnel vision" about certain issues in your life, and for whatever reason you are unable to see various perspectives on these issues. It can serve as a call to get in touch with the root of your choice to see things with a limited perspective.

Dreaming about people whom you don't know, can't see or can't understand maybe a reflection of other sides of yourself that need examination. You may be experiencing some unfamiliar emotions, or exercising some buried rage. This interpretation springs from the idea that we're everyone in our dreams, so seeing unfamiliar faces who mumble words means that something strange and rather incomprehensible is going on within your psyche. That's not to say that you can't figure it out, or resolve it, just that it is unfamiliar at this time.

The fear that you're experiencing in the dream suggests to me that you may be experiencing some kind of test to your core values. Something is causing you to question the security of your inner self, in other words, something seems to be causing you to question your identity. This theory can also tie back into the main symbol of the dream, the tunnel standing in for a birth canal, a call for the security of earlier years.

I would advise taking a little time out of your day today to figure out what this issue is that is causing so much fear in your life. And please, if there is anything you remember later on, or if you have any comments on what I've said, please feel free to email again. Thank you for sending your dream in for a free interpretation, I hope this helps!

-
Rachel